In Which I Detail My DMV Experience

I maintain that this would be an AWESOME license photo

I had to go to the DMV last week to renew my driver’s license. I know. Boo! Hiss!

So imagine my surprise when the whole thing actually went kind of well. First off, I had an appointment, so I didn’t have to wait very long to get assigned to a counter. I was totally nervous that I wouldn’t pass the eye test without corrective lenses, but I did. The lady that saw me at first was really nice, and was trying her best to get another woman with a fussy baby to be helped (because who likes listening to fussy babies?).

I got stamped and approved, paid my renewal fee, and got sent to stand in the line to get a new photo, which made me a little bit sad, because the one I have now was taken about two weeks after my honeymoon, and I always think of that when I get carded and have to pull it out.

Someone asked if there was anyone in line just taking a new photo, not taking the driver’s test. “Me!” I jumped, and got moved to the front of the line in another area of the office. The guy told me where to stand, and I asked if I had to keep a straight face. He said no, so I made a sassy kissy face, mostly just to see what he’d say. He laughed and said I couldn’t do that.

“Why not? This is the face I’ll make if I get pulled over,” I retorted. Thankfully, he thought it was hilarious, and then shot a picture of me with my regular smile. We got to chitchatting a bit (there was no one behind me), and I mentioned that I really liked his purple shirt. It was a sort of lilac-y plum color, and I thought it would look really good on Leif, so I asked where he got it.

He told me years ago, and that it wasn’t his favorite, but that they all had to wear purple on Wednesdays. Um … why? It’s a union thing, he told me.

“The DMV is SEIU?” I exclaimed.

“Yeah, how did you know that?” He seemed genuinely surprised that the kissy-face girl would know that the color purple plus the word ‘union’ equals SEIU. Go figure.

“Oh, I work in politics,” I mentioned off-handedly. “So not only do they take a chunk of your paycheck, but they make you wear purple once a week?”

“Yeah, and it’s a big chunk too. I don’t even know what they do with it. We get sandwiches once a month though. Most expensive sandwiches I’ve ever eaten.”

“So sorry, Dude,” I told him, then wished him well and headed out the door, totally surprised by the pleasant, easy experience. Maybe health care run like the DMV won’t be so bad, I let my brain wander.

Let’s break it down:

  • I had to make an appointment two weeks in advance for a simple, routine, in-and-out procedure.
  • The most invasive test I received was covering up one eye at a time with a 3×5 card and reading a line of 6-7 letters.
  • The union running the place garnishes the employees’ wages and only offers them a monthly sandwich in return. Maybe they’re spending the money on this?
  • Anyone awaiting more comprehensive procedures requiring a specialist (like the driving test) had to wait in ridiculously long lines.

So I guess running health care like the DMV won’t be a big deal at all, so long as you don’t mind making appointments for routine procedures far in advance, waiting a long time to see specialists, or unions running the show.

Maybe that’s why Michelle Obama is so into combating childhood obesity. If no one every gets heart disease or diabetes, no one will ever question the efficiency of government-run health care.

Top 7 for the Week of January 27th

This week, Ashley and I talked about:

  1. The State of the Union
  2. More Solyndra and Green Energy Fail
  3. Death Row Inmate Mocks Taxpayers
  4. Who’s the Racist Now?
  5. The Power of the Private Sector (in Vegas!)
  6. Rand Paul and the TSA
  7. French Elle, Michelle Obama, and Fashion in the African-American Community
Plus we have a rant, a dirty joke from Eli, and our Dude of the Week.
Happy listening!

Listen to internet radio with Top 7 on Blog Talk Radio

Michelle Obama’s $495 Gardening Boots Irk Me

In a post I wrote regarding Michelle Obama and her plans to parent our children for us, I remarked about her $495 Tory Burch gardening boots. A few of the comments wondered why I brought them up, and why, as acapitalist, would I have a problem with pricey shoes?

The boots were mentioned to remind readers of how out of touch with reality the First Lady is. The average American mama doesn’t have a single pair of shoes in her closet that cost that much, let alone gardening boots. When I’m inclined to work outdoors, I put on a pair of three-year-old sneakers that are practically falling apart.

Referring to the self-appointed mom-in-chief’s aloofness when it comes to relating to us regular moms was useful to drive home the point that she is not qualified to make our parenting decisions for us. Only the best for the Obamas, whether it’s boots, schoolvacationvacationvacation, or vacation. The rest of us can eat cake. Or carrot sticks.

Read the rest at The Stir

Michelle Obama Fights the Childhood Obesity Epidemic

First Lady Michelle Obama has a problem with fat kids. More specifically, she doesn’t like childhood obesity. Last year she launched the Let’s Move campaign, with the goal of ending childhood obesity in a generation. After all, it isnational security risk (insert eye roll here).

Lady Michelle promoted legislation to overhaul school lunches, which her husband signed into law at the risk of sleeping on the couch. She’s constantly on my TV when my kids are watching their shows, encouraging young viewers to get active. She even slips into her$495 Tory Burch boots to do some organic gardening at the White House.

Most recently, Mrs. Obama has been talking with the National Restaurant Association about providing smaller portions andhealthier options on the kids’ menu. She must know better than restaurateurs how to run their businesses.

Read the rest at The Stir

The Tale of Two Summer Vacations

I know I’m late to the game to add my two cents to the Obama-vacay-in-Spain-water-cooler-talk. I’ve been busy living the glam life with Brittany Cohan in Wisconsin.

Or at least the relaxed life. I left the kids at home.

This is my summer vacation.

A $393.89 plane ticket purchased with reward points. An awesome friend with a guest room. A low-key Sunday spent in pajamas, on the couch, watching chick flicks and reading about Sookie Stackhouse, and drinking a little too much cheap wine.

It’s not Hawaii, but times are tight. And it’s not like it’s going to get easier anytime soon, what with the largest tax increase in history coming up in mere months.

It’s Wisconsin for me, because that what my budget allows for. It’s not a lavish hotel in Spain, where Michelle and one of her daughters vacationed over the weekend. Which I really wouldn’t care about under ordinary circumstances. They have money. Great. Fantastic. They should spend it however they want. Beauty of America and all that jazz.

Except that the majority of the trip’s cost was covered by Mr. & Mrs. Taxpayer. Almost $150,000 for transportation costs alone. Michelle apparently paid for her own hotel room, but America paid for the lavish lodging of her security detail at the Ritz-Carlton. Who knows how many other associated costs were paid for by you and me?

So let me get this straight: My taxes are going up so that Michelle can quite literally have tea with the Queen of Spain while I’m drinking a $4 bottle of wine in Wisconsin?

Is anyone else scratching their head?

Cover the extra costs yourself, First Family, or come on over to Wisconsin. I’ll even pour you a glass of cheap wine.